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Joke of the Day

"I received their wedding invitation on Facebook, so I sent them a gift from Farmville....figured it was appropriate."

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"You don't see many dog librarians. Probably because of the barking."
"Before Instagram people had to display their photos in fish tanks full of piss."
"How do you turn a duck into a soul singer Put it in the microwave until its Bill Withers"
"I asked the manager if I could sample the sausage and that's when I was asked to leave Costco. THE SAUSAGE Not YOUR sausage"
"Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and horse!"
"Smart Students :D :P Question asked by a Student.! If a single Teacher cant Teach us all subjects, then.. how could you expect a single student to Learn All subjects.??"
"So I've been thinking the world's getting more pessimistic... What do you fucking retards think?"
"Why do I have migraines? Well I can't have yourgraines, now can I?"
"When I see a black guy in a suit I high five him & say ""Innocent until proven guilty MOTHA FUCKAA!!!"" Bc he probably just came from court."