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Joke of the Day

"It is impolite to cry in front of the whole library about your WebMD self-diagnosis of terminally sprained sciatica pneumonia AIDS."

"If buying new underwear is evidence of an affair, my husband has been faithful for at least nine years."

"How do you build a flea circus? You have to start from scratch."

"Mexico's prison system"

"What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta"

"Back in my day, Nintendo Wii meant you peed your pants because you wouldn't move for hours playing Super Mario Bros."

"What's Cain's favorite genre of music? Rock, I hear his brother hates it though."

"My friend was in a terrible accident, and now has to breathe through a straw ...you could say he sucks at life."

"The fridge is a clear example that what really matters is what is inside."

"What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair? Barberians."