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Joke of the Day
"Give a man a six pack and he'll drink for a day. Give him a 24 pack and he'll drink for a day."
Next Joke
"If you find yourself in a hole. Stop digging."
"What did the milk say after it got beat? ...It's butter this way"
"A wheel fell off the vegetable cart... A wheel fell off the vegetable cart. What do you need to fix it? Asparagus. (A spare, I guess)"
"Real person: Do you have Twitter? I'll follow you! Me: Nope, sorry. Don't have a phone or a computer. Or a microwave. Hard times and all.."
"Patient: I always see spots before my eyes. Doctor: Didn't the new glasses help? Patient: Sure now I see the spots much clearer."
"How do you make a 5yr old cry twice? When you rub your dick on her teddy bear."
"My mother taught me about reverse osmosis. ""Shut your mouth and eat your dinner."""
"Your love is like Vicodin. You take away my pain but make me sick to stomach afterwards and you're also white."
"What's the difference between a bus driver and a cold? A bus driver knows the stops and a cold stops the nose."