206592

Joke of the Day

"If you piss me off bad enough and tell me to leave you alone, I will take 30 Adderall and send you cat pictures every 3 minutes for 6 days."

"An Israeli is going through passport control at JFK... The immigration officer asks: ""Occupation?"" The Israeli says: ""No. I'm just visiting."""

"Two cannibals are stewing up a clown One turns to the other and says, ""Does this taste funny to you?"""

"What do you call the 72 virgins that Allah gave isis? Goats"

"I gave two pints of blood at the hospital. You would think they'd appreciate it but they just started asking me questions like... Who's blood is this, and how did you get it?"

"What do you call something that you do to your self with one hand? A Selfie!"

"If you watch cinderella backwards its about a woman getting put in her place."

"A hot babe said we could have sex if monkeys fly out of her ass, so tonight I meet with a zoologist, proctologist and some guy from NASA."

"My sleeping pills say don't mix with alcohol, but drop it in the glass and it dissolves just fine. Doctors think they know everything."

"My cross fit application was was rejected Bad form"