206440

Joke of the Day

"Your password must include 5 minutes of interpretive dance, 15 excerpts from contemporary fiction and 1 word made up by Shakespeare."

"What's the worst part about being a beaver? It's a lot of dam work."

"I like my coffee like I like my women Ground up and in the fridge."

"Why Republicans cannot swim as freely as they want? Dems!"

""" Could you explain to me why I woke up this morning with a cucumber up my ass? "" My wife screamed. "" Could you explain to me,"" I yelled back, "" Why you didn't wake up when I put it there? """

"What do girls and parking spaces have in common? All the good ones are taken and the rest are disabled"

"Rest in peace boiled water You will be mist."

"Some guy robbed a local gas station and stole $700 worth of cigarettes. I wonder what he'll do with both packs."

"Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch Sorry, my cat walked on my keyboard and accidentally typed something Welsh."

"The electoral college needs to go away. The tuition rates are out of control."