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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Eye-deer"

"Your Mom's so stupid... That when the teacher asked her to do an essay, she fucked a mexican."

"""If you have a ministry like Jesus it will probably be made up of about 12 people who don't get your illustrations, & 1 wants to kill you."""

"I see ISIS is finally practicing Structured Programming. They're eliminating GOTOs."

"""How much for the mannequin in the clown outfit?"" ""Sir, she came in with you!"""

"What has four legs and can fly? Two Birds!"

"Why do melons insist on having big weddings? Because they just cantaloupe."

"How do you tell the difference between a Pakistani wedding and an ISIS training camp? I don't know, I just fly the drone"

"When someone tells me, ""I think of you as family,"" I assume I'm about to be yelled at for something that happened 10 years ago."

"""I love you. I'd do anything for you."" -let me see your phone real quick ""You're smothering me. I need some space"""