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Joke of the Day

"I live in fear of my kids going outside when it's raining, because they could get wet and multiply."

"I forgot to wear my glasses when I drove today. I didn't even notice I wasn't wearing them until the kid on my windshield said something"

"Want to feel old? Tsar Simeon I of Bulgaria would be 1,150 years old today!"

"Many people think a pirates favourite letter is R. It's actually the C"

"I got a handjob from a blind girl last night. She said ""You've got the biggest dick I've ever put my hands on."". I said ""Nah, You're just pulling my leg.""."

"Your mumma so fat. Its not a joke. im just stating facts"

"What did the man say to the priest at the beach? Do you mind getting out of my son."

"What is the difference between British beer and a pussy? The pussy only tastes like piss at the start."

"Why isn't there a Price is Right porn yet? Nobody's willing to cum on down"

"OMG! THERE'S A SERIAL KILLER ON THE LOOSE! ""OMG."" Wtf are you doing?! ""HIDING MY DAMN CEREAL!"""