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Joke of the Day

"Two snowmen are standing next to each other in a field when one looks over to the other and asks: ""Do you smell carrots?"""

"3 things happened to me today 1. I woke up 2. I met a hot girl 3. I kissed a hot girl But it happened in this order, 1. I met a hot girl 2. I kissed a hot girl 3. I woke up"

"I saw on the news today that a dwarf got pickpocketed. I don't know how anyone could stoop so low!"

"""Hey Adam, can you get me some water?"" ""Sure I can, while I'm up and at 'em!"""

"Why did the orange go to the doctor? Because she wasn't peeling very well... All credit to my 8 yo son who suggested I post it here"

"What do you call a man with three cocks? A farmer"

"So If the Pope shits in a toilet.... Does that make it holy shit? Aaaand thats my shitpost for the day."

"A context joke Have you ever noticed that when you say, ""I hope you're hungry"" in a place like America it's nice. But if you say that in Africa it is a cruel joke."

"I find hanging around in coffee shops A great way to espresso yourself"

"His palms are sweaty... His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already. WebMD: *TYPHOID FEVER*"