204523

Joke of the Day

"Do I have any jokes about Sodium? Na"

"Elephant meets a camel somehow. The elephant asks the camel why he has boobs on his back. The camel replies, ""You don't have much to say because you have a dick on your face."""

"Would you like to learn about the Mormon Church? ""No thanks."" Don't judge too quickly. We have a lot of sects... ""WHERE DO I SIGN UP?"""

"I answer with an automatic ""Yes"" each time my mom says ""Oh, have I told you...?"" I could miss out on something good but chances are slim."

"therapist: ""remember there are no stupid questions"" wife: ""okay"" therapist: ""keith you start"" me: ""do sharks ever need to have a bath?"""

"I'm at my most nurturing when I'm plotting a way to drop my 12 yr old at school 3 days early."

"This guy at the bar wouldn't shut up about how Zombies ""could be real"" So I killed him... If he comes back...He wins the argument"

"You know why I Hate Carpools? Everytime I go through a tunnel my wrist hurts."

"All those who proclaim that a dog is man's best friend, Have never played with a pussy."

"Why do bald men cut holes in their pockets? So they can run their fingers through their hair."