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Joke of the Day

"What do you call four Mexicans stuck in quicksand? quattro sink-o"

"Q: How many screenwriters to make ""Titanic"" a good movie? A: One more than they had."

"Why did the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong socks today."

"My stomach just growled so hard I thought I was getting a text message."

"You really have to hand it to blind prostitutes."

"Why are cows always broke? The farmers milk them dry."

"How does a cow kiss? Smooooooch"

"Whenever I work out, I wear a push-up bra so I can do more push-ups. If I didn't, it'd be so embarrassing and people would laugh at me."

"DOCTOR: *stethoscope on my back* Gimme a very slow exhale. ME: EXXXXHHHHHHAAAALLLLLE"

"I'm not particularly bad at cooking, but how long is the pasta supposed to stay in the toaster?"