203519
Joke of the Day
"Why is today John Philip Sousa Day? Because he told everyone to march fourth."
Next Joke
"God doesn't play dice well, that's what he tells Mrs God."
"Micromanager Knock Knock Who's there? Micromanager. Now, you say 'micromanager who?'"
"At my funeral play the Super Mario original theme until my casket is lowered in the ground then play the underground music"
"Shop Locally. Sometimes we have the thing you need maybe I dunno come back next week."
"Ever hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica? It was dreadful."
"Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. Bartender says ""Hey Mr. Pirate, ya know you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" Pirate says ""Yarrrrr, it's driving me nuts."""
"My dad walked in while I zoomed in on Street fighter Dad: ""Damn son, that girl has some big 'ol titties!"" Me: ""Dad.......thats E. Honda"""
"Pierce Brosnan and Daniel Craig are unbelievably close friends. It's almost like they share some kind of Bond."
"Why do grocery stores double-bag everything? Like why don't you just make bags that are twice as strong?"