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Joke of the Day
"Why didn't the monk's clothes fit properly? Because he was cohabiting."
Next Joke
"What do you call a mexican with two dads? No mames!"
"Would a gay shop owner decline service to straights? No, because gay people aren't fucking assholes"
"KNOCK KNOCK... Who's there? Kicks! Kicks who? Kicks Ronda Rousey for the Knock out!"
"*buys shed at B&Q* B&Q: Are you putting this up yourself? Me: No, it's going in the garden. B&Q: Me: B&Q: I can't help you anymore."
"I had phone sex with my boyfriend over a walkie-talkie. I could hear him coming from a mile away."
"Cop: You there! Hands over your head! Me: *raises hands* *30 avocados fall out of shirt* Cop: Holy guacamole!"
"""Daddy, are we poor?"" Compared to the vast majority of humans on earth? No. ""Compared to my friends?"" Oh yes, sweety. As the very dirt."
"Someone just honked to get me to get out of my parking spot faster so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead"
"What's sometimes white, sometimes red and sometimes brown? My dick."