203093
Joke of the Day
"My wife and I can't agree on appropriate gardening attire. But she's digging in her heels."
Next Joke
"A line to use on Polish people You must be a magnetic Pole because I'm attracted to you."
"how do you drown a blonde? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool"
"The closest feeling I get to being a soldier in war is when I'm accidentally in the path of a thrown football."
"I just drank coffee I forgot on the counter this morning. It was so cold and bitter I wrote it an alimony check."
"The ironic thing about the original Scooby Doo adventures was that the only real supernatural phenomena they encountered was a TALKING DOG."
"Why is Hillary spelled with 2 L's? One for 2008 and one for 2016."
"When you give someone a present, unless you say ""open it"", they're legally not allowed to look inside."
"If you feed me & have the heat on high, I will fall asleep on you. So to have a much more interesting date with me keep me hungry and cold"
"What are the two fastest things in the world? The second fastest is your asshole snapping shut. The first fastest is that little drop of water..."