202921

Joke of the Day

"Two old ladies are sitting on a prk bench when a streaker ran past. One had a stroke. The other couldn't reach."

"A skeleton walks into a bar Tells the bartender, ""Gimme a beer and a mop."""

"Newlyweds tell the hotel desk clerk ""we need a room we just got married!"" Clerk says ""would you like a bridal?"" The husband replies"" no I'll just hold her by the ears until she gets the hang of it."""

"My iPhone is currently updating so I have to tweet from my computer like some Ethiopian kid."

"What does a worm do in a cornfield? It goes in one ear and out the other"

"Does anyone else get bothered by that last inch the shower curtain wont cover?"

"Q: How can you tell if a cat is blonde? A: No matter what height you drop it from it always lands on its head."

"What's the easiest way to tell if somebody's lying? He/she's not sitting or standing!"

"I always ware my Seahawks jersey on test day... Because i know ill pass even if i shouldn't"

"Sorry I can't make it to lunch today. I forgot to shorten ""people"" to ppl in a text this morning and now I'm totally behind schedule."