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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why do Chinese noodles make the best lovers?? A: Because they are 'Lo Mein-tenance' and they don't won a ton of attention. ...but then again, Italian noodles have great Penne-tration..."

"They say you shouldn't smoke or drink when pregnant. I disagree. Best give it a shot before you splash out on another abortion. Besides there are only so much hangers in the world."

"A child asked me where babies come from. I said,""Like every other man, in Vegas after a night of drinking and clubbing."""

"I have a joke. Me."

"I used to rub my hair together when I was stressed... But now I'm dreading the consequences."

"Q: Why do blondes occupy about 90% of the net bandwidth? A: Because they keep accidentally deleting their copies of the blonde joke list."

"Why was the broom late? It overswept!"

"Shoutout to the sidewalk For keeping me off the streets....."

"How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb? I'm better than you!"

"They aren't making foot rulers any longer Why you ask? If it was any longer it wouldn't be a foot"