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Joke of the Day

"Why is Bon Jovi's bed always messy? Because he thinks it doesn't matter if you make it or not"

"What's black and red, flashes like hell and annoys men? Live Jasmine"

"What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo? Great big holes all over australia"

"Congratulations, parents! The names yelled at dog parks are now less weird than the names yelled at playgrounds."

"Did Batman know that Alfred was embezzling billions to finance a 4-person Magic act that was a front for robbing banks?"

"'I hope you're not one of those boys who sits and watches the school clock' said the principal to a new boy. 'No Sir. I've got a digital watch that bleeps at three-fifteen.'"

"I like my Xmas turkey like I like my ass With my grandmum's fists in it, pulling out the stuffing."

"According to my iPhone 6, I could commit a heinous crime, without using gloves, and have a different fingerprint just minutes later"

"Lesbians favourite vegetable? Okra Edit: For the people who don't get it [Okra, also known as ladies' fingers](#s)"

"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender says, ""Hey, that thing is cool - where did you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""Africa."""