202550

Joke of the Day

"My fiance, feeling a bit under the weather, just blurted out this knee-slapper at 3AM... Why does Bill Nye get sleepy after writing calligraphy? Because of the Nye Quill."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ""That's not funny."""

"""I just read last year 4,153,237 people got married. I don't want to start any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?"""

"How do you piss of an archaeologist? Hand him a tampon and ask what period it's from."

"Admit it... You get a small rush of happiness when your crush likes your Facebook status."

"FBI: If you testify you'll have to go into the Witness Protection Program ME: I'll do it FBI: Your wife and kids too ME: Oh ok never mind"

"Women who say the quickest way to a mans heart is through his stomach hasn't seen his browser history."

"The awkward moment you're watching porn and your girlfriend walks in. I wish she'd told me she worked in the industry."

"So, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs walk into a bar... and I got sued for millions because I used both of their names in the same sentence."

"Elephant and a naked man An elephant walks up to a man who was not wearing clothes and asked, ""How do you breathe out of that thing??"""