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Joke of the Day
"Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to... Unless you're in prison."
Next Joke
"I asked my girlfriend to buy me some Japanese food. ... sushi did."
"What did the farming professor say to his new students? ""Welcome to my field."""
"I'm not saying I'm antisocial, but even when someone asks me how I'm doing I just tell them to Google it."
"My phone just fell down a flight of stairs, but it's ok, it was in my pocket."
"Silly Rabbit, Trix are for a culture of entitled white American children who are systematically fed a diet of high fructose corn syrup."
"How do you annoy a Redditor? [deleted]"
"What do you call a sleep walking nun? A roamin' catholic."
"I feel like dinner parties are secretly competitions about who watches the most news and documentaries"
"Few things in life are more pleasurable than turning off the lights in a public bathroom while people are still inside"