201558

Joke of the Day

"What do you call Asian quadruplets? 4chan"

"My wife is such a terrible cook... We say grace after we're done eating."

"Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I'm just gonna shake their soda"

"What is WRONG with you??? Me: *slowly counting on fingers* let's see... ok... carry the 1... um... That would be everything"

"Threw my new neighbors a house-warming party... The police called it arson. Whatever..."

"Your first instinct is gonna to be to spell ""leopard"" and ""deaf"" correctly. You're going to want to resist that. Best band manager ever."

"Sanders supporters are like... that kid in class that gets Fs and Ds the whole semester and then says ""If I get a 100 on the final I can still get a C"""

"If I had five coconuts and I gave you three how many would I have left ? I don't know. Why not ? In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges."

"Can somebody explain to me the uproar over the CEO editing posts? I mean... what part of Chief Editing Officer don't these people understand?"

"I love babies... ...but I can't finish a whole one."