201518
Joke of the Day
"Ooop, you spit-talked on me. I'm just gonna pretend nothing happened and freak out inside my mind."
Next Joke
"what is kurt cobain's eye color Blue. One blue to left, one blue to the right."
"Whenever our neighbor's dog is barking, I know there's either someone at their door or literally anything else in the universe has happened."
"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his cock."
"1. Hide babies all over house. 2. If a kid asks, ""Where do babies come from?"" laugh, ""Where DON'T they come from!"" and open every cabinet."
"Why do inquisitive peppers annoy people? Because they get jalapeno business."
"""Daddy what is a transvestite?"" ""Ask Mommy, he knows."""
"Everyone's an atheist until they're making a phone call & praying it goes to voicemail"
"The Nationwide commercial didn't make me feel anything but I once dropped my chicken nuggets and cried for an hour and forty minutes."
"Hitting a bullseye requires a lot of practice, good aim, and running from angry, blind bulls."