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Joke of the Day

"Where do they make contentment? At the satis-factory."

"My wife and I couldn't have a baby so we decided to go to an adoption agency. I was so excited while I was in there. It made me happy to think that I could finally take off the baby on board sticker."

"Misery loves company. But not you. Even Misery has standards."

"Guys, leave 3 notes scattered around ur house for ur girlfriend that say ""Will"", ""you"", & ""me."" That'll keep her busy while u watch sports."

"when i hear fat people say that they've made mistakes, i always think to myself, ""yeaa...at the grocery store."""

"I told Leonardo DiCaprio a joke about an Oscar He didn't get it."

"My bra is off, my pajamas are on, my hair is up. I'm not sure if I'm going to bed, or to Walmart."

"""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."" - neighborhood drunk"

"Jesus walks on water and everyone is impressed. I walk on water and I'm seriously concerned about this ice breaking..."

"My mate went to Alaska and fell in love with both a male and female bear... He's Bipolar.."