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Joke of the Day
"Me: Siri, why am I alone? Siri: *opens front facing camera*"
Next Joke
"Gary Johnson in an Interview.. Reporter: Knock Knock! Gary Johnson: Who's there? Reporter: What is Alep Gary Johnson: What is Alepwho? Reporter: a-are you serious?"
"""To Kill a Mockingbird"" ""Oh, I just used a slingshot."""
"A little jewish girl was playing with an ashtray... Hitler comes in and says: ""Are you looking for someone?"""
"Roses are Red, Violets are blue... ...I've got Alzheimers, cheese on toast"
"Everyone uses body wash these days. What happened to good old-fashion soap? Is it too basic?"
"Then an extremely attractive couple walked in, instantly ruining everyone else's good time."
"How can you tell the difference between normal and self-raising flour? One has parents"
"Have you heard about the corporation that controls all the world's cheese? The hallouminatti."
"""Election"" and ""erection"" actually have the same meaning. They're both about a dick rising to power."