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Joke of the Day

"My questionnaire for dogs: 1. Do you like to get pet 2. Who is a good boy 3. Is it you"

"Call me old school, but I think your shorts should be longer than your private parts."

"There was an orgy at the camp site last night... ... it was fucking in tents. I'll show myself out..."

"If you steal ideas from only one person, it is called plagiarism. If you steal from many people, it is called research."

"Why can't you hang out with bears? Their bad breath is un-bear-able."

"I'm a passive aggressive driver. I pass other drivers and then aggressively speed towards the next one."

"*Runs into bank with gun* Alright! Everyone put your hands up! *Tickles everyone*"

"Do cats stutter? No, but they paws."

"What is the difference between jelly and jam? [NSFW?] What is the difference between jelly and jam? *I can't jelly my dick up your ass.*"

"My girlfriend told me our safe-word was too easy to forget I said, ""Ok, let's make it 'harder.' """