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Joke of the Day

"Do you think Charlie Sheen admitted to being HIV positive on national television... because it was easier than making phone calls?"

"Just when I manage to convince myself that I am a superior and more intelligent being, I walk into a door."

"Whats the difference between being hungry and horny? Depends where you put the cucumber"

"Where does Sean Connery keep his guns? In the library of course. They're for shelf-defense."

"My girlfriend has this weird fetish Where she dresses up like herself, and acts like a total bitch"

"Sex is easy... Telling your dad he's pregnant isn't."

"You know who are the best pussy magnets? Gynecologists.."

"At the men's bathroom of the local college... ... above the toilet paper dispenser was a piece of graffiti: ""Liberal Arts Degrees. Take One."""

"How many points do I get if I hit a Pokemon player with my car?"

"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? Don't expect me to get hard in 3 minutes, I just got laid this morning."