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Joke of the Day

"If you are really good at comedy you can make $250 writing for a multimillionaire."

"Why did the fisherman drill a hole in the ice? For the Halibut"

"The nice thing about being a girl is OH MY FUCKING GOD THERE'S A BAT IN THE HOUSE, HONEY, GET IT! GET IT!"

"Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere"

"What did one Casket say to the other Casket? ""Is that you Coffin?"""

"I'm giving up on the argument... From now on I will pronounce it 'gif'."

"""How about a month of obligations, overspending, difficult travel and horrible weather?"" - The pitch for the month of December."

"My girlfriend is like my bank account Only there for the money"

"Why do you hold your hand flat above your eyes when you look into the distance? Because when you would cover your eyes with your hand, you wouldn't see sh*t. I'm lame."

"Did you hear the one about the guy with two wooden legs? They caught fire and he burnt to the ground."