199814

Joke of the Day

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

Next Joke
 
"What is the opposite of Imagination? I have no idea."
"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dead baby in your apple."
"What happens when you witness a shipwreck? You let it sink in."
"A man sees a blonde girl staring intently at a ice cube in her hand The man asks the girl why she's staring at the ice cube and she responds, ""I'm trying to figure out where it's leaking from."""
"Boss: go to hell Me: so stay? or leave? I'm confused"
"Someone just asked me to fax them my email address. Careful driving folks, these people walk amongst us..."
"I just read that a veteran policeman has been suspended from his job... after being caught masturbating and smoking weed in his office. No name was given but he was a high wanking officer."
"I just tinder matched with a block of cheese."
"I tried to make friends at a midget convention by telling some jokes But all my material went over their heads."