199460

Joke of the Day

"I had such a bad allergic reaction to a peanut today... ... that I got sued by TheFineBros."

"Can a ninja kill someone from a distance? Shuriken!"

"I wish my girlfriend.... Would go down as much as Pokemon Go servers"

"What does a rabbi do when life gives him lemons? Makes hacidic jews"

"I hate tattoos For instance, if you get a tattoo of a Tarantula, 60 years later it'll look like Daddy Long Legs."

"A very busty woman whispers to me ""I want you to tell me if these look real"" my eyes widen, then she takes out pictures of the moon landing"

"I saw some footage of some polar bears drinking water today. It's obviously fake. Everybody knows they only drink Coca-Cola."

"My friend said he was really down because of his car troubles... I told him i didn't wan't to hear his saab story."

"Why didn't the skeleton go to homecoming? because he had no body to go with"

"When I reached the border patrol checkpoint, I raised my kale smoothie & the officer immediately waved me through."