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Joke of the Day

"Hey, teenage girls, don't get pregnant. Unless you want your own TV show."

"Like a radiologist researching sausage digestion, I tend to see the Wurst in people"

"What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek? If we stick together we can stop this crap!"

"When pharmacist gets sick....... Does the doctor give him a taste of his own medicine?"

"I asked Roy Hodgson if he would consider 4-4-2 next week. He said, ""No, we'll probably go 7-4-7 it's wider and offers more leg room."""

"Why don't you ever see elephants hiding up in trees? Because they're really good at it."

"[First date] Her: I'm really glad you asked me out yesterday in the park Me: *looking under table* you didn't bring your dog?"

"Why couldn't Miss Piggy count to 70? She got a frog stuck in her throat at 69."

"What do you call an underwater masochist? A submarine!"

"Two flies are on a wall... One looks at the other one and says, ""Hey, your human is open""."