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Joke of the Day

"Is a man more intelligent before, during or after sex? During. Because you're plugged into the know it all"

"It sucks being a wiener. Your best friends are a couple of nuts and you neighbor's an asshole."

"Atheism and Religion are but two sides of the same coin. One prefers to use its head, while the others relies on tales..."

"I'm doing it doggy style today. Lying on the couch not doing a damn thing. I will bark if you knock on the door."

"All I wanna do is *gun shot gun shot gun shot* and *cash register noise* get off Sound Effect Island"

"A man walks down a street with his dog Stranger: hey that's a nice dog Man: yes but I'm afraid I'm going to have to put him down Stranger: ah how sad, why so? Man: he's fucking heavy"

"Jared of Subway fame's house was raided for investigation of child porn charges..... I found it surprising, as Jared seems to prefer footlongs."

"Guys how can you tell if a girl is attracted to you? She touches her ears with her ankles"

"Why don't tennis players get married? Because to them love means nothing."

"Hitler killed... six million Jews..."