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Joke of the Day

"On a scale of 1 - 10 where 10 is being up on technology and 1 is washing clothes by beating them on a rock, I'm about a 5."

"I have a theory that consuming little bits of peanut butter encased in colored candy shells provokes silly rhymes. I call it my Reeces Pieces Thesis. . . . . I'll see myself out."

"Im proud to be a black man! Said the black man Im proud to be an asian man! Said the asian man Im proud to be a white man! Said the racist"

"Most drug-sniffing dogs refuse to admit they have a problem"

"what retail store does a cat go to when it loses it's tail? a retail sto- goddamn it I did it again"

"The bartender asks, ""what can I get you?"" A neutrino walks into a bar. (See it arrived before it set off... myeh)"

"Why doesn't Hitler like Jewish wivern's? Because they're a dragon the state"

"How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One."

"Whats the question to the answer ""it's a cockrobin"" What's that up my ass Batman?"

"Friend: ""Omg, your parents are so nice!"" ... You: ""It's because you`re here.."""