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Joke of the Day
"My wedding will be open casket."
Next Joke
"What kind of photograph does Arnold Schwarzenegger take? Polaroids."
"My ex wife died so I went to the cemetery and to honor her, I poured a fine, 12 year old bottle of scotch on her grave. But first I filtered it through my kidneys. EDIT: Holy crap! Front page!!!"
"Why was the belt thrown in jail? He held up a pair of pants."
"I like my comedic timing like my pizza delivery With pepperoni."
"What do you call a sink that doesn't work? A faux-cet."
"My dad and I were never that close. The company he worked for once had a ""father-son"" picnic and he invited his father"
"I would like to thank you people for letting me know its Friday every week. Its thoughts like this that keep me on Facebook."
"A duck fell into the sewer system the other day... It was pretty fowl-smelling."
"A man walks into a gay bar and says... ""Whose dick do I have to suck to suck a dick around here?"" Heard it on Game Grumps."