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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why do ya reckon Blonds don't have elevator jobs? A: Cos they've no idea of the route."

"Does anyone want to buy a broken yo-yo? No strings attached"

"What do they call the 13th floor in England? The 12th floor."

"I'm definitely the drunkest person in this ball pit."

"Why are they using two ply toilet paper in Russia? Because authorities want a carbon copy of all matters."

"According to the manual, I can have an extra ten Weight Watchers Points if I start breast feeding."

"Whats the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits till you're 12 to come on your face"

"Giant bird goes to a psychiatrist.. ''I feel like I'm ignored all the time.'' ''Maybe it's because you're ostrich sized''"

"The Dallas gunman was a bit late. I know he wanted red whites in blue, but the 4th of July was like a week and a half ago."

"I love walking down the street smiling to myself. It really freaks people out. Especially if my trousers are round my ankles."