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Joke of the Day

"Adventures Of Pedo-Sherlock How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes? -Elementary, my dear Watson."

"Hit 1,000 followers and a 100 star tweet on the same day! Do you know what that means?! 900 of you don't read my shit."

"A man lovingly told his fiance ""I don't have a big house or a yacht like my friend, Harry, but I will love you forever."" She replied, ""Oh, yeah. I love you too. Now, who's this Harry?!"""

"How does a farmer find a sheep in the long grass? Satisfying"

"How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram"

"If Dwane Johnson were to actually run for President... He could only lose to paper."

"What do you call a really, really quiet piece of meat? A shh-kebab. --- I love you too, fellas."

"An old white man in a beard bestowing gifts from the sky? Please."

"Why was the iPhone 7 so embarrassed? He was caught jacking off."

"An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough."