196323

Joke of the Day

"Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was assalted."

"What the difference between a calender and you.... a calendar has a date on Valentines day."

"I'm Puerto Rican, but not ""carries a knife in my purse everywhere I go"" Puerto Rican. Sometimes it's in my bra."

"I finally found out what FDA stands for. Fucking Die Already"

"If Iron Man and the Man of Steel were to team up, they'd be powerful alloys."

"Sex so good the peeping Tom made sandwiches."

"There is no ""we"" in pizza"

"How can you tell if your wife left you? You get laid the same amount of times but the dishes start to pile up. Hey now!"

"*gets shot* ""Lassie im hurt, quick get pa"" *Lassie gives me her paw* ""lol i see what you did there girl"" *we both laugh as i bleed out*"

"What sexual position do you use to make an ugly baby? Go ask your mom"