196138

Joke of the Day

"I changed my night club's name to Erectile Dysfunction for one night Nobody came... If ya know what I mean (God, please don't punish me for saying this)"

"I'm going to open up an opticians that also sells jewellery and handbags It'll be called Assess your eyes."

"i put the "":/"" in ""http://""."

"Why does America not have knock knock jokes? Because freedom rings."

"whats the difference between my driveway and 14 year old daughter? ... I pull out of my driveway"

"Vampires love tea... A vampire goes into a pub and asks for boiling water. The barman says ""I thought you only drink blood?"" The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, ""I'm making tea""!"

"Girls use lotion for hands Boys use lotion for skin."

"Why are Christians so bad at Trigonometry ? They're afraid of sin"

"I have zero empathy for sociopaths. But to be fair, they don't have any for me, either."

"A guy walks into a doctor's office... ...with corn in his ears, a carrot shoved up his nose and a potato in his butt. Doctor says, ""Buddy, you're not eating right..."""