195960
Joke of the Day
"A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often."
Next Joke
"My favorite part of the Bible is where Jesus gives money to the rich, tells the poor to suck it up and asks for Caesar's birth certificate."
"*pulls up pants* Me: It feels like I've got the world's worst wedgie! Proctologist: That's normal. M: ... P: Hey... Have you seen my glove?"
"beluga whale backstroke and blowing water http://youtu.be/M6f1vovJTP4"
"I hope I never have to produce an alibi...cause eating salsa in bed with my cat every night would never hold up in court."
"Maybe the seventh time around I'll feel different about finding something I want to eat if I glance in the fridge just once more."
"I don't think 'safe sex' sounds like a very good idea. I mean, what if you get locked in and forget the combination"
"A duck fell into the sewer system the other day... It was pretty fowl-smelling."
"the average person eats three spiders a year, but as you're about to find out, it takes an entire year for three spiders to eat a person"
"I invented a new word today! Plagiarism."