195915

Joke of the Day

"My Ex-Wife still misses me... BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER! It's funny because marriage is terrible."

"When a girl comes over for a date, I make sure I leave a hammer and measuring tape on the counter so she doesn't suspect that I watch Glee"

"I like my dates like I like my women... ...across the street and unaware that I'm watching!"

"A poor old man got hit by a car today. I say poor because he only had 90 cents in his wallet."

"""What do you do in your free time? "" ""I stalk. "" ""Really? I go swimming and for long hikes"" ""I know.""."

"[OC] Are vegetarians allowed to have pudding? If so how can they have pudding if they don't eat their meat?"

"how many apples does it take to make a pie? 3.14159265358979323846....."

"How did one goldfish get the attention of another goldfish? He yelled, ""A u, fish!"""

"What do you call white grand parents? Graham-crackers... ""wokka wokka"""

"How do you describe someone who has a boner when they are at their workplace? Hard at work"