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Joke of the Day

"While visiting Ireland last year, a nice friendly old man said to me... ""Sir, if you ever come within a mile of my house, I hope you will stop there."""

"Q: What did Captain Cook say to his men before they got on the ship? A: Let's get on the ship, men!"

"The Jackhammer, Now that was a groundbreaking discovery."

"Apple announced a breast implant that plays music... The iTit is considered a major social break through since women have always complained that men stare at their breasts but never listen to them."

"A Canadian walks into a bar has a drink, pays his tab, and leaves."

"What's the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a marathon full of feminists? The tribe of pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts."

"Where does a pornstar go for timeout? The casting couch"

"What does a shaved otter look like? Odder... Sorry"

"My therapist picked a cool time to go on vacay I'm making decisions out here like a wild animal"

"Did you hear about the new Obama Healthcare Burrito? You don't find out whats in it until you pass it..."