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Joke of the Day

"My fashion sense has been described as ""They probably won't let you in like that"" and ""Are those your pajamas?"""

"Why don't they give hurricanes epic names like cyclone of doom or the fate fairy instead of frikken Sandy...."

"I'm on Twitter because my brother got a chemistry set for christmas when he was little and I got plaid pants."

"What did the cannibal comedian say as he battled through his steak dinner? Tough crowd."

"Walk up to someone drinking coffee and ask them if their coffee tastes different today. Then smile and walk away."

"What kind of fence goes on strike? A picket fence."

"If you`re not going to help me break into my ex`s house to delete the hysterical message i left on his answerphone,then you`re not my friend"

"I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet I don't know why"

"What technique does a prisoner use when coloring a picture? Cell shading."

"Why did Elvis' mom get mad when people called him ""Elvis the pelvis""? Because he had a brother named Enos."