195061

Joke of the Day

"Don't forget to wear your best clothes to church because Jesus was all about one-upping your neighbour with fancier duds."

"Anal sex and cabbage have a lot in common. If you're forced to have it as a kid, you probably won't enjoy it as an adult."

"What did the man say when he realized the boy who asked him out was an orphan? No home oh"

"Waiter! Waiter! This salad is frozen solid. Yes sir. It's the iceberg lettuce that does it."

"I'm really claustrophobic and just walked into a room crammed full with married people... Luckily there wasn't a single person in it"

"My parents were like siblings. And according to the police that was, like, a problem."

"I used to want to live in the sewers with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles when I was a kid so I'd say I'm a success compared to that."

"Those luxury car ads with a sexy couple zigzagging through the hills should really end with the passenger puking on the side of the road."

"We could save a lot of hassle if we just made macaroni out of cheese in the first place."

"Did you hear about Apple's new product? It was a big 6s"