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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the arms dealer who's giving away M18 Claymores with every purchase? Oh, I'm gonna get mines."

"KFC is a shelter for battered chickens"

"Why is a pensioners vagina like a pork pie? Because you have to bite off the crust and lick out the jelly before you get to the meat."

"Whats the worst thing about the deaf women being raped She didn't hear them cumming"

"Scientists discover that Jupiter's moon, Europa, may be suitable for human habitation. When asked to comment Jupiter stated, ""Oh, hell no."""

"9: What did that message on the TV say Me: It said, the film has been modified to fit our screen 9: How do they know what size TV we have?"

"So, a snake walks into a bar.... And the bartender asks in surprise ""how'd you do that?!"""

"What did the nucleus say to get the electron up? Up and atom!"

"Why did the pilot hit the Alps? To get to the other side."

"My girlfriend said she wants me to make her feel like shes the only girl in the world. So i'm gonna drop her off in the desert and leave"