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Joke of the Day
"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance We'll see about that."
Next Joke
"I play Jenga on the first date... so she knows my pull out games strong"
"A politician in an ancient civilization... He'll only just babble on."
"[opens jar of olives and pours them in my garden] ""Now grow to be a restaurant"""
"Duct Tape Turning ""No no no"" into ""mmm mmm mmm"""
"'twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, everyone was screaming... Just cuz I went into the wrong house."
"Why does the homeless man only drink coffee? He had no proper tea.."
"What does a bee do with his stinger at night? Put it in his honey."
"Have you been to Iran? I don't think you should go, I don't think they like joggers."
"Here's a tip: When making sad face emoticons, use :( If you use ): that means your mouth fell off and a frisbee is lodged in your forehead"