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Joke of the Day

"Why can't the homeless ever get by in America? because there's no chaaaannggggeeeee"

"How to break up with someone: You: Your ex is attractive. Partner: Which one? You: ME. You: BYEEEE"

"What do an alcoholic and a necrophiliac have in common? They both feel like fucking death in the morning."

"If Apple has taught me anything, it's wait to see the ""Steve Jobs"" movie until they release a second version."

"Q: How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it."

"I remember your face, and I even remember what we talked about, but what the hell was your name again?!"

"Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The Wheelchair"

"Will playing ""GTA IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony"" make me a homosexual? Same question for ""GTA IV: The Lost and The Damned."

"My friend was doing impersonations of The A-Team. I told him they were amazing. You should have seen his Face..."

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? A porcupine has its pricks on the outside."