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Joke of the Day

"I remember your face, and I even remember what we talked about, but what the hell was your name again?!"

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"What's brown and sticky A stick"
"What's the best drug to have sex on? Birth control."
"Two necrophiles are discussing their love lives. Necrophile 1: What happened with you and Brenda? Necrophile 2: Ah, you know how it is. . .the rotten cunt split on me."
"Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? Because she was a woman"
"My dad called to ask if sending an email to the USA costs more. I told him a LOT more, better not risk it"
"Why is the Queen only 30cm Tall She is a Ruler..."
"Don't worry, you are safe Zombies eat brains"
"Customer: Why doesn't your menu list prices? Waiter: We didn't want to make you sick before the food does."
"""I heard you have unlimited breadsticks?"" Sure do, table for 1? ""Quack!"" Wait a second *trench coat falls, family of ducks run away*"