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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum."

"How did the constipated mathematician solve the problem? He worked out with a pencil."

"Malaysia Airlines special offer Now with more bang for your buk!"

"Oscar Pistorius wanted a new bathroom door... ...but apparently his girlfriend was dead against it."

"Jokes I made up I might keep adding onto this if it gets popular enough :) Q: What did the man say while holding a square shaped clock? A: I'm holding Time Square!"

"How did the Pharaoh feel after falling for a craigslist scam? Egypt"

"Tell me twitter, just how the f am I similar to a Buick dealership?"

"A game developer recently released a ""rectal prolapse simulator""... ...they called it ""Fallout""."

"My cousin Denise's baby Alpo was born with no feet and a full adult penis because she drank Four Loko when she was pregnant :("

"They say that murder rates go down with more employment, so I bet if we gave everybody jobs murdering people, they'd be really bad at it."