194039

Joke of the Day

"I went to the store today to stock up on bread, beer, and Captain Morgan just in case Hurricane Sandy decides to double back to NC..... Always good to be prepared..."

"Football joke How do you keep the St. Louis Rams off of your lawn? Paint an endzone on it."

"Once Chuck Noris .... Once Chuck Noris had sex in a pick up truck ... today the truck is known as Optimus Prime."

"Sometimes when I talk to people I start pointing at crouches. (Point)"

"Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!"

"What did Jesus say to all the black people before he died on the cross? Don't do anything till I come back."

"When I see someone's name trending on twitter, I used to be afraid they died. Now I'm afraid they're a Republican presidential candidate."

"What to hear a joke? A girlfriend.. While the humor is dry, in this joke i fully understand that this is not something many of you will ever get."

"Growing a beard comes from laziness. If you ladies think that's sexy I have some laundry on my bedroom floor that'll turn you on."

"I heard a joke about corn the other day. It was amaizeing"