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Joke of the Day

"What did the ancient Egyptian cheerleader chant? ""THERE IS ONE GOD, HE IS THE SUN GOD! RA! RA! RA!"""

"If the Trader Joe's cashier doesn't say ""I love these"" about anything you're buying, you have to put it all back and start over. #sorrybro"

"0 Jokes Q: What did Zero say to Eight? A: Nice belt. Q. What did Zero say to Nine? A: Nice dick. Q: What did Zero say to Ten? A: Hey don't kick my ass."

"""Boint, B-U-R-N-T, boint."" - mafia spelling bee."

"Yo mama so fat... ... slapping her belly causes gravitational waves. OR ... every step she takes causes a ripple in special relativity."

"When people say ""You can fit a million earths in the sun!!!"" I'm like: Hey. Maybe we shouldnt put any earths in the sun. The sun is hot."

"Contemplating the merits of the Oxford comma as I head down to Florida to see my parents, Donald Trump and Marco Rubio"

"What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth."

"Two cannibals are eating a clown One says to the other, does this taste funny to you?"

"Swimming in the Ocean I while back I was sitting on a beach in Mexico watching this guy in the ocean screaming ""HELP SHARK, HELP!"" I just laughed, I knew that shark wasn't going to help him."