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Joke of the Day

"suicide joke. man #1: IM GOING TO JUMP (is going to commit suicide) (everyone is in shock) man #2: DO A FLIP"

"What type of fruit loves chocolate the most? A Coconut."

"How do you call a cow with no legs? You don't, because cows don't have phones."

"Why doesn't Saran Wrap have any friends? Because it sticks to itself."

"My girlfriend just accused me of being a transvestite I was absolutely furious, so I packed her things and left"

"I just responded to a text message with: I can't hear you, you're breaking up"

"What's a paedophile's favourite musical scale? A minor"

"we are the animals that forgot we were animals"

"What's worse than paper tits? Cardboard box."

"*cats pull on masks* This is the ultimate heist. Let's get those jewels. *cats immediately set off alarm trying to attack the laser beams*"