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Joke of the Day

"ME AS A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR: I signed you both up for Tinder *1 week later ME: You still want a divorce? THEM: OMG NO THAT WAS HORRIFYING"

"What does all pirate music have in common? It's all played in the high C's."

"I bought a female horse around 10pm What a night mare"

"Suddenly she was on her back, clothes strewn everywhere and her wrists bound to her ankles. She always had trouble hanging out the washing."

"A father and son were watching a movie together The son says ""Daddy I'm scared. Is that woman going to die?"" And the father replied with ""Well, I don't know son. That is a pretty big horse cock."""

"What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!"

"My son has just earned his first boy scout award for 'video gaming'. I guess the next ones will be for 'social ineptitude' & 'pale skin'."

"9: I'm going to live with you guys forever me: I don't ever want to hear those words come out of your mouth again"

"What do you call 2 people with identical penises? Doppelwangers"

"[Rorschach test] Patient: Leprechauns in cheetah print unitards kickflipping over flaming tree stumps Dr: I think we can skip the others"