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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a hydrocarbon that tells fart jokes? Crude Oil."
Next Joke
"This salad isn't going to toss itself. *winks* - Things you shouldn't say as you pass food around the Thanksgiving table :("
"How many social justice activists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't change anything lol"
"Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the best ingredients, you cruel bastards."
"Joke request Tell me your best joke that includes ""July"" ""fourth"" and ""fire"" Let's see what you've got, Reddit!"
"Who do people hate and love but is really hot and goes to beach everyday? Sun of a beach"
"*slowly raises hand 20 minutes into an important office meeting* so there are no donuts?"
"TOP REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES: 1) Ted Cruz 2) A gun 3) Your racist uncle 4) A gun in a cowboy hat 5) Jeb Bush 6) Literally a turd"
"Wife: Can you fix this, the holes too big for the thingy majingy? Me: Hey I know how it feels! Hahaha! *And then I regained consciousness"
"I spent the day in nature and by nature I mean drinking beer on a golf course. I saw a butterfly."